Cheap Travel

There are some people for whom an airport is like a bus stop. They fly twice a week to attend business meetings and spend half their lives listening to flight announcements and listening to boarding calls.

For others, airports will be the doorway to travel, adventure and broadening of the mind. Like some magic portal, you step through this hub of transport onto a metal bird which takes you to an almost identical hub somewhere else and you step out into another world.

Airports can be dull, confusing and dodgy places to be and so here are a few tips for the traveler who finds himself stuck in one:

a. It’s generally okay to sleep in airports but try to find somewhere quiet. The seats in the waiting areas tend to have arm rests designed to make it impossible to stretch out. The bastards.

b. It’s not a good plan to look after anyone else’s luggage and never, but never carry someone else’s bags on board. However friendly they might seem they could be drug smugglers using you as a mule.

c. In fact, if you’re feeling paranoid or you’re in a dodgy part of the world like South America or South East Asia, you might want to think twice about talking to anyone. If they suddenly pass out as the bags of heroin in their stomach burst open, you may well be pulled in as an accomplice. It happens.

d. If your flight looks to be very busy you can always ask about volunteering to stand down – if the carrier is overbooked they sometimes pay $300-400 for passengers willing to spend the night in a 4 star hotel (all paid for) and then fly again the next night. Money for nothing.

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